Legend of Sally: Quest for Eternity
[The episode opens up with Sally walking down the downtown Summerway streets. She passes by a store filled with televisions, the camera aims at the televisions. She walks by them when a pixelated explosion happens on one screen.]
Announcer: Hey! You there!
[Sally keeps walking by, blissfully unawares.]
Announcer: Do you like awesome things that are awesome?
[Sally stops for a moment]
Sally: Oh great... one of these ads...
Announcer: You got that right! You see, we've got this hot new game that you need to try!
Sally: One of those commercials that pretends to know when, when they dunno anything about you.
Announcer: It'd be the perfect game for you, Sally.
[Sally is taken aback in surprise.]
Announcer: Or Adrian or Miller or whatever you name is. We've got the most awesomest game that you'll ever play.
[The screen shows a shadow standing on a mountain overlooking a land filled with various video-game styled levels - fire, ice, etc - all in a 16-bit pixelated look.]
Announcer: I've got three words for you: The Chain is Back.
[The shadows fade away to reveal a video game character that looks like a fusion of Cloud Strife and Link. Cut to Sally counting on her fingers.]
Sally: That's... four words. And what kind of stupid name is Chain anyway?
Announcer: Don't insult my math when I'm telling you how crazy awesome this game is! Because this is a remake. You don't have to play as Chain if you don't want to. Now we've got character customization!
Sally: This is the worst commercial I've ever seen.
Announcer: Just buy Legend of Chain: Quest for Eternity already. In stores now.
Sally: And why should I do that?
Announcer: Because all your friends are gonna get it too.
[Sally looks on guiltily]
Announcer: And people already think you're a freak because you're talking to a television out in public.]
[Cut back to reveal many people looking on at Sally with confusion. Many of them are creeped out.]
Announcer: Hey! You there!
[Sally keeps walking by, blissfully unawares.]
Announcer: Do you like awesome things that are awesome?
[Sally stops for a moment]
Sally: Oh great... one of these ads...
Announcer: You got that right! You see, we've got this hot new game that you need to try!
Sally: One of those commercials that pretends to know when, when they dunno anything about you.
Announcer: It'd be the perfect game for you, Sally.
[Sally is taken aback in surprise.]
Announcer: Or Adrian or Miller or whatever you name is. We've got the most awesomest game that you'll ever play.
[The screen shows a shadow standing on a mountain overlooking a land filled with various video-game styled levels - fire, ice, etc - all in a 16-bit pixelated look.]
Announcer: I've got three words for you: The Chain is Back.
[The shadows fade away to reveal a video game character that looks like a fusion of Cloud Strife and Link. Cut to Sally counting on her fingers.]
Sally: That's... four words. And what kind of stupid name is Chain anyway?
Announcer: Don't insult my math when I'm telling you how crazy awesome this game is! Because this is a remake. You don't have to play as Chain if you don't want to. Now we've got character customization!
Sally: This is the worst commercial I've ever seen.
Announcer: Just buy Legend of Chain: Quest for Eternity already. In stores now.
Sally: And why should I do that?
Announcer: Because all your friends are gonna get it too.
[Sally looks on guiltily]
Announcer: And people already think you're a freak because you're talking to a television out in public.]
[Cut back to reveal many people looking on at Sally with confusion. Many of them are creeped out.]
[Jump cut to Sally slamming down a pile of Ginomon cards on a counter. The camera pans up to reveal that Sally's in a video game store.]
Sally: I'd like to buy Legend of Chain: Quest for Eternity.
[A girl is at the checkout. She looks up boredly from "Super Gamer Magazine."]
Game Store Girl #1: A bit late on that one, huh?
Sally: What are you talking about? It was just released today.
Gamer Store Girl #1: Yeah, which is why everyone already bought their copy two months ago. Speaking personally, I don't think you're hardcore enough.
Sally: What are you talking about? I've been playin' games my whole life.
Game Store Girl #1: Lemme guess, Marzipan Muncher?
Sally: Yeah... well no. I mean yeah, but not just that.
Game Store Girl #1: This game is old school.
Sally: You mean out-of-date, right?
[Sally sticks out her tongue.]
Game Store Girl #1: Do you want the game or not?
[A television in the background starts playing the commercial again.]
Announcer: Remember Sally, everyone you know is gonna get this game--
[Sally stares at the television for a brief second or two.]
Announcer: Or Jenny or Gearfried or whatever your name is.
[Sally gives a determined expression towards Game Store Girl #1]
Sally: Yes, I WILL buy this game, and I'm gonna beat it! And when I do I'm gonna laugh in your face. Laugh. In. Your. Face.
[The Game Story Girl #1 places the cartridge down on the table. It doesn't look like it belongs to a specific console (snes, nes, genesis), but it is indeed a video game cartridge]
Game Store Girl #1: Well, when you decided to buy something more appropriate to your skill level, remember: there are no refunds.
Sally: I'd like to buy Legend of Chain: Quest for Eternity.
[A girl is at the checkout. She looks up boredly from "Super Gamer Magazine."]
Game Store Girl #1: A bit late on that one, huh?
Sally: What are you talking about? It was just released today.
Gamer Store Girl #1: Yeah, which is why everyone already bought their copy two months ago. Speaking personally, I don't think you're hardcore enough.
Sally: What are you talking about? I've been playin' games my whole life.
Game Store Girl #1: Lemme guess, Marzipan Muncher?
Sally: Yeah... well no. I mean yeah, but not just that.
Game Store Girl #1: This game is old school.
Sally: You mean out-of-date, right?
[Sally sticks out her tongue.]
Game Store Girl #1: Do you want the game or not?
[A television in the background starts playing the commercial again.]
Announcer: Remember Sally, everyone you know is gonna get this game--
[Sally stares at the television for a brief second or two.]
Announcer: Or Jenny or Gearfried or whatever your name is.
[Sally gives a determined expression towards Game Store Girl #1]
Sally: Yes, I WILL buy this game, and I'm gonna beat it! And when I do I'm gonna laugh in your face. Laugh. In. Your. Face.
[The Game Story Girl #1 places the cartridge down on the table. It doesn't look like it belongs to a specific console (snes, nes, genesis), but it is indeed a video game cartridge]
Game Store Girl #1: Well, when you decided to buy something more appropriate to your skill level, remember: there are no refunds.
[Cut back to the Dunn house, in the living room. Robert is sitting around, playing a video game of his own.]
Sally: My turn!
Robert: It's my homework for class.
Sally: No homework tonight. My turn!
[Robert shrugs]
Robert: Alright, I'll do it later.
[As Sally gets to the console, Robert walks upstairs. She takes out the game that's inside, and literally tosses it to the side. A window breaking sound is heard, and Sally puts in her new game. She grabs the controller and presses start.]
Sally: Let's see, character customization.
[Cut to the video game to see a pixelated Sally in 16-bit; in an adventurer's costume. While she plays, chiptune music is heard. A "press start" on the screen. Sally apparently does this, and the screen flashes as Sally swings her sword on the screen.]
[The camera pans over a destroyed city, and text appears, line by line. Sally reads it aloud as she does]
Sally (off-screen): (reading) Long ago, there was harmony in the world. Seven kidzdoms came together in peace and propserity and--
Sally: Does anyone really play these games for the story?
[Sally presses a button and the camera cuts to seeing her avatar in the actual game, in a grassland/Green Hill Zone area. She walks forward, and then the ground breaks away and Sally immediately falls into a pit of spikes. Jump cut back to Sally in the real world with appropriate reaction.]
Sally: That's no fair! It's a beginner's trap!
[Sally looks upset, but she continues to play. However, it doesn't get easier for her. She manages to jump over the pit, but she frequently gets hit by enemies; spikes fall down from a ceiling and fall on her; platforms disappear beneath her feet; and Sally's sprite gets a cartoonish reaction before each time she dies.]
[Cut to rapid shots of the real world Sally getting progressively angrier and angrier, and giving her own groans of annoyance and frustration.]
[Cut back to the actual game and Sally has made it to the end of the first level. An evil shadowy figure stands in front of her.]
Shadowy Figure: The meteor is meditating in the castle of suffer. But avast yee!
[Reaction shot of Sally looking on very confused. Immediately cut back to the game.]
Sally Sprite: Shadowy man, you'll never win as long as my heart stays true!
Shadowy Figure: Ah, it's easy to say this when your courage is weighed down by power. But let's see how you handle this!
[Several Zelda-esque items appear around Sally, and they disappear in a reference to Symphony of the Night.]
Sally Sprite: No! Not my items!
[Reaction shot f Sally in the real world]
Sally: Wait... I had items?
[Cut back to the game.]
Shadowy Figure: Good luck stealing my realms from me now!
[The screen goes dark, and then a bright cheery tune plays and the game announces "Level 1 Complete!" Crash cut to Sally back in the real world.]
Sally: What!? That was only the FIRST level? I've been playing for three hours!
Shadowy Figure (voice over): Your ranking on this level is Git Gud.
[Sally gets a very annoyed expression. She presses the button and the game opens up on the second level of the game, a fiery volcano level. Seconds after Sally starts, her character gets hit by a turtle creature. Cut to a game over screen.]
Shadowy Figure (voice over): Game Over! (evil laugh)
[Sally's character is now back at the beginning of the first level. A pause jingle is heard. Cut to Sally in the real world, looking on disbelief.]
Sally: What!? You get a game over and you go all the way back to the start!? Who would want to play this!? You'd need to be crazy to!
[Sally puts the controller down and the shot holds as Sally gives a pouty expression, almost as if the episode itself is waiting for her to continue the game. She rolls her eyes and picks the controller back up.
Sally: My turn!
Robert: It's my homework for class.
Sally: No homework tonight. My turn!
[Robert shrugs]
Robert: Alright, I'll do it later.
[As Sally gets to the console, Robert walks upstairs. She takes out the game that's inside, and literally tosses it to the side. A window breaking sound is heard, and Sally puts in her new game. She grabs the controller and presses start.]
Sally: Let's see, character customization.
[Cut to the video game to see a pixelated Sally in 16-bit; in an adventurer's costume. While she plays, chiptune music is heard. A "press start" on the screen. Sally apparently does this, and the screen flashes as Sally swings her sword on the screen.]
[The camera pans over a destroyed city, and text appears, line by line. Sally reads it aloud as she does]
Sally (off-screen): (reading) Long ago, there was harmony in the world. Seven kidzdoms came together in peace and propserity and--
Sally: Does anyone really play these games for the story?
[Sally presses a button and the camera cuts to seeing her avatar in the actual game, in a grassland/Green Hill Zone area. She walks forward, and then the ground breaks away and Sally immediately falls into a pit of spikes. Jump cut back to Sally in the real world with appropriate reaction.]
Sally: That's no fair! It's a beginner's trap!
[Sally looks upset, but she continues to play. However, it doesn't get easier for her. She manages to jump over the pit, but she frequently gets hit by enemies; spikes fall down from a ceiling and fall on her; platforms disappear beneath her feet; and Sally's sprite gets a cartoonish reaction before each time she dies.]
[Cut to rapid shots of the real world Sally getting progressively angrier and angrier, and giving her own groans of annoyance and frustration.]
[Cut back to the actual game and Sally has made it to the end of the first level. An evil shadowy figure stands in front of her.]
Shadowy Figure: The meteor is meditating in the castle of suffer. But avast yee!
[Reaction shot of Sally looking on very confused. Immediately cut back to the game.]
Sally Sprite: Shadowy man, you'll never win as long as my heart stays true!
Shadowy Figure: Ah, it's easy to say this when your courage is weighed down by power. But let's see how you handle this!
[Several Zelda-esque items appear around Sally, and they disappear in a reference to Symphony of the Night.]
Sally Sprite: No! Not my items!
[Reaction shot f Sally in the real world]
Sally: Wait... I had items?
[Cut back to the game.]
Shadowy Figure: Good luck stealing my realms from me now!
[The screen goes dark, and then a bright cheery tune plays and the game announces "Level 1 Complete!" Crash cut to Sally back in the real world.]
Sally: What!? That was only the FIRST level? I've been playing for three hours!
Shadowy Figure (voice over): Your ranking on this level is Git Gud.
[Sally gets a very annoyed expression. She presses the button and the game opens up on the second level of the game, a fiery volcano level. Seconds after Sally starts, her character gets hit by a turtle creature. Cut to a game over screen.]
Shadowy Figure (voice over): Game Over! (evil laugh)
[Sally's character is now back at the beginning of the first level. A pause jingle is heard. Cut to Sally in the real world, looking on disbelief.]
Sally: What!? You get a game over and you go all the way back to the start!? Who would want to play this!? You'd need to be crazy to!
[Sally puts the controller down and the shot holds as Sally gives a pouty expression, almost as if the episode itself is waiting for her to continue the game. She rolls her eyes and picks the controller back up.
[Cut to the cat clock on the wall. Time passes. Sally is still playing her game. She's still struggling on the first level. She gets hit by an enemy and ends up falling down a pit.]
Sally: Come on!
[Robert walks up]
Robert: Hey Sally?
Sally: (shouting) What do you want!?
Robert: I do need ot do my homework. Ms. Kimiko really wants me to beat her game.
Sally: I told you, I'd let you play later.
Robert: Yeah, but that was five months ago.
[Sally doesn't register this for a beat. She plays for a moment. Even briefly cut to the game and Sally trying to play through it. Pause jingle.]
Sally: Wait a minute, five months!?
Robert: Kidding. But before you know it, it will be. You've been playing that game a lot lately.
Sally: I can't help it! I gotta beat it!
[Robert takes a look at the game and sees the shadowy figure. He gets slightly frightened by it.]
Robert: Huh, I kind of remember that.
Sally: How can you? It just came out.... I think.
Robert: Legend of Chain, right?
Sally: Yeah, how did you--
[Robert takes a look at the box.]
Robert: It looks like this is a remake of a game that I played as a kid.
Sally: Wait, really?
Robert: Yeah, and I was pretty good at it too, if I remember righht.
[Sally offers the controller]
Sally: Show me.
[Robert shrugs, sits down on the couch, and starts playing the game. As he claimed, he's actually an expert and overcomes challenges that Sally struggled with rather easily. Cut to Sally's expression, wild with disbelief.]
Sally: B-but how!?
Robert: I used to play these kind of games a LOT as a kid.
Sally: Why'd you stop?
[Robert gives an awkward expression]
Robert: Well, it had this awkward era awhile back--
[Cutaway to the Legend of Chain characters in a style reminiscent of the Zelda CDI games.]
Chain: Oh boy! I get to smash Didgeridoo!
Shadowy Figure: Ah yes, but you'll never get to stop me my boy!
[Cut back to Robert]
Robert: And of course, there was that whole "edgy" era.
[Cutaway to a dark and gritty 3D version of the Legend of Chain is a modern dystopia. A wall explodes and Chain steps through, holding a gun. He looks angered at the camera.]
Chain: I'm going to KILL that Didgeridoo! With lots of killing! I'm going to KILL him to death!
[Cut back to reality, and Robert shivering in fear.]
Sally: You gotta help me!
Robert: Let's see what you've got.
[The camera doesn't even cut to the game. Sally simply presses one button on the controller.]
Shadowy Figure: Game over! You suck!
Robert: Looks like we're going to be in for some work.
Sally: Come on!
[Robert walks up]
Robert: Hey Sally?
Sally: (shouting) What do you want!?
Robert: I do need ot do my homework. Ms. Kimiko really wants me to beat her game.
Sally: I told you, I'd let you play later.
Robert: Yeah, but that was five months ago.
[Sally doesn't register this for a beat. She plays for a moment. Even briefly cut to the game and Sally trying to play through it. Pause jingle.]
Sally: Wait a minute, five months!?
Robert: Kidding. But before you know it, it will be. You've been playing that game a lot lately.
Sally: I can't help it! I gotta beat it!
[Robert takes a look at the game and sees the shadowy figure. He gets slightly frightened by it.]
Robert: Huh, I kind of remember that.
Sally: How can you? It just came out.... I think.
Robert: Legend of Chain, right?
Sally: Yeah, how did you--
[Robert takes a look at the box.]
Robert: It looks like this is a remake of a game that I played as a kid.
Sally: Wait, really?
Robert: Yeah, and I was pretty good at it too, if I remember righht.
[Sally offers the controller]
Sally: Show me.
[Robert shrugs, sits down on the couch, and starts playing the game. As he claimed, he's actually an expert and overcomes challenges that Sally struggled with rather easily. Cut to Sally's expression, wild with disbelief.]
Sally: B-but how!?
Robert: I used to play these kind of games a LOT as a kid.
Sally: Why'd you stop?
[Robert gives an awkward expression]
Robert: Well, it had this awkward era awhile back--
[Cutaway to the Legend of Chain characters in a style reminiscent of the Zelda CDI games.]
Chain: Oh boy! I get to smash Didgeridoo!
Shadowy Figure: Ah yes, but you'll never get to stop me my boy!
[Cut back to Robert]
Robert: And of course, there was that whole "edgy" era.
[Cutaway to a dark and gritty 3D version of the Legend of Chain is a modern dystopia. A wall explodes and Chain steps through, holding a gun. He looks angered at the camera.]
Chain: I'm going to KILL that Didgeridoo! With lots of killing! I'm going to KILL him to death!
[Cut back to reality, and Robert shivering in fear.]
Sally: You gotta help me!
Robert: Let's see what you've got.
[The camera doesn't even cut to the game. Sally simply presses one button on the controller.]
Shadowy Figure: Game over! You suck!
Robert: Looks like we're going to be in for some work.
[Cut to inside the game. Sally's sprite is at a platform that goes back and forth at a rapid pace.]
Robert: Alright, now time your jumps carefully.
[Sally waits for a second. She jumps, misses. Jumps, misses. And then she finally makes it.
Sally (sprite): I did it!
[The sprite jumps for joy happily, and the platform gets ahead of her, leaving her open to the pit below. The sprite stays airborne and it looks towards the camera.]
Sally (sprite): Well, I should have seen this coming.
[Cut to a montage of Sally's sprite's deaths. Every time her sprite gets attacked, she gives a cartoonish over-the-top expression of fear. She sneaks past a beehive, but gets chased and attacked by them. She runs along a field, and then a fire spout comes up and singes her sprite. She gets attacked and absorbed by a king slime. She opens a chest, and then gets attacked by bees.]
Shadowy Figure: Game over! Again!
[Cut back to the real world. Sally tosses her controller]
Sally: I'm never gonna do this! That's it. I'm giving up.
[Sally walks off. Cut to a shot with Robert looking at the shadowy figure on the television]
Shadowy Figure: Oh don't worry, she'll be back. They always come back.
Robert: Yeah whatever. I've heard that one before.
Shadowy Figure: Shut up, you dork!
Robert: How did you--
Shadowy Figure: There's a microphone on the second controller.
Robert: Alright, now time your jumps carefully.
[Sally waits for a second. She jumps, misses. Jumps, misses. And then she finally makes it.
Sally (sprite): I did it!
[The sprite jumps for joy happily, and the platform gets ahead of her, leaving her open to the pit below. The sprite stays airborne and it looks towards the camera.]
Sally (sprite): Well, I should have seen this coming.
[Cut to a montage of Sally's sprite's deaths. Every time her sprite gets attacked, she gives a cartoonish over-the-top expression of fear. She sneaks past a beehive, but gets chased and attacked by them. She runs along a field, and then a fire spout comes up and singes her sprite. She gets attacked and absorbed by a king slime. She opens a chest, and then gets attacked by bees.]
Shadowy Figure: Game over! Again!
[Cut back to the real world. Sally tosses her controller]
Sally: I'm never gonna do this! That's it. I'm giving up.
[Sally walks off. Cut to a shot with Robert looking at the shadowy figure on the television]
Shadowy Figure: Oh don't worry, she'll be back. They always come back.
Robert: Yeah whatever. I've heard that one before.
Shadowy Figure: Shut up, you dork!
Robert: How did you--
Shadowy Figure: There's a microphone on the second controller.
[Cut to Sally walking by the video game store. She tries to hide her head in shame as she walks by, but from the corner of her eye she sees a video game guide book for Chain of Eternity. The book has "infinite loves code inside" written on the cover.]
Sally: Infinite lives!? Maybe that's how everyone does it. I gotta get it.
[A little kid walks by]
Little kid: Hey lady, why are you talkin' to yourself?
[The two of them awkwardly look at the camera for a beat.]
[Sally rushes into the store and grabs the book. Much to her dismay though, Game Store Girl #1 is at the checkout.]
Sally: [Grumbly] Oh great, why does she have to be working here?
Game Store Girl #1: Because she's one of the owners.
Sally: Oh that's just great--
[The camera pans to reveal another Game Store Girl right behind Sally. Sally sees her and jumps to the ceiling in fright, dropping the guide book. Hanging from the ceiling, she looks at the two Game Store Girl twins back-to-back. The one who just spooked Sally is Game Store Girl #1; the other is Game Store Girl #2]
Sally: [Deadpan] I hate it when twins do that.
Game Store Girl #1: Hey, I remember you.
[The Game Store Girl #1 sees the guidebook on the floor and grows a smug expression.]
Sally: Wait! No! Don't!
Game Store Girl #1: You need a guide? (Chuckles) What kind of gamer are you?
Sally: One who likes to have fun with the games that I play!
[Sally slips off the ceiling and falls to the floor in a cartoonish fashion.]
Game Store Girl #1: I guess you just can't do it. You're so level one. Might wanna buy a baby game, we gotta a few in the back. I think they're more your speed.
[Sally just grumbles as she picks herself up.]
Game Store Girl #1: What happened to being able to handle this kind of game?
[Sally slowly, silently gets angrier as Game Store Girl #1 continually rants.]
Sally: I WILL beat that game, and I'll do it WITHOUT your stupid game, and I am still gonna LAUGH in your face.
[Sally marches off angrily, and Game Store Girl #1 is smug. Game Store Girl #2 walks to her, sees the book in Game Store Girl #1's hand, and gets angry.]
Game Store Girl #2: Did you just cost us another sale?
[Game Store Girl #1's smug expression vanishes.]
Game Store Girl #2: Can beat Ultra Man without losing a life, but can't shut her big mouth when it matters.
[Game Store Girl #2 walks off angered.]
Sally: Infinite lives!? Maybe that's how everyone does it. I gotta get it.
[A little kid walks by]
Little kid: Hey lady, why are you talkin' to yourself?
[The two of them awkwardly look at the camera for a beat.]
[Sally rushes into the store and grabs the book. Much to her dismay though, Game Store Girl #1 is at the checkout.]
Sally: [Grumbly] Oh great, why does she have to be working here?
Game Store Girl #1: Because she's one of the owners.
Sally: Oh that's just great--
[The camera pans to reveal another Game Store Girl right behind Sally. Sally sees her and jumps to the ceiling in fright, dropping the guide book. Hanging from the ceiling, she looks at the two Game Store Girl twins back-to-back. The one who just spooked Sally is Game Store Girl #1; the other is Game Store Girl #2]
Sally: [Deadpan] I hate it when twins do that.
Game Store Girl #1: Hey, I remember you.
[The Game Store Girl #1 sees the guidebook on the floor and grows a smug expression.]
Sally: Wait! No! Don't!
Game Store Girl #1: You need a guide? (Chuckles) What kind of gamer are you?
Sally: One who likes to have fun with the games that I play!
[Sally slips off the ceiling and falls to the floor in a cartoonish fashion.]
Game Store Girl #1: I guess you just can't do it. You're so level one. Might wanna buy a baby game, we gotta a few in the back. I think they're more your speed.
[Sally just grumbles as she picks herself up.]
Game Store Girl #1: What happened to being able to handle this kind of game?
[Sally slowly, silently gets angrier as Game Store Girl #1 continually rants.]
Sally: I WILL beat that game, and I'll do it WITHOUT your stupid game, and I am still gonna LAUGH in your face.
[Sally marches off angrily, and Game Store Girl #1 is smug. Game Store Girl #2 walks to her, sees the book in Game Store Girl #1's hand, and gets angry.]
Game Store Girl #2: Did you just cost us another sale?
[Game Store Girl #1's smug expression vanishes.]
Game Store Girl #2: Can beat Ultra Man without losing a life, but can't shut her big mouth when it matters.
[Game Store Girl #2 walks off angered.]
[Cut back to the Dunn house, Robert is sitting on the couch and he is playing the game.]
Shadowy Figure: You haven't changed, have you?
Robert: Shut up.
Shadowy Figure: Why don't you just make me?
[Robert looks as if he's about to answer, but Sally angrily storms in. As she does, Robert tosses his controller to the side.]
Robert: Hey Sally, just doing my homework.
Sally: Nevermind that. Help me beat the game! I'm gonna rub my win in the face of that snot-nosed jerk. She thinks I can't play games like this!
Robert: Sally, games should be fun. You shouldn't play them for vengeance or anything like that.
[Sally pouts for a moment, but she does calm down.]
Sally: I guess so. I'm sorry. It's just... this game! It's driving me crazy.
Robert: It's alright. Just keep trying and I'm sure you'll make it through sooner or later.
Sally: But we've trained and trained and I keep dying!
Robert: Maybe we should change up our approach a bit.
Sally: What do you mean?
Shadowy Figure: You haven't changed, have you?
Robert: Shut up.
Shadowy Figure: Why don't you just make me?
[Robert looks as if he's about to answer, but Sally angrily storms in. As she does, Robert tosses his controller to the side.]
Robert: Hey Sally, just doing my homework.
Sally: Nevermind that. Help me beat the game! I'm gonna rub my win in the face of that snot-nosed jerk. She thinks I can't play games like this!
Robert: Sally, games should be fun. You shouldn't play them for vengeance or anything like that.
[Sally pouts for a moment, but she does calm down.]
Sally: I guess so. I'm sorry. It's just... this game! It's driving me crazy.
Robert: It's alright. Just keep trying and I'm sure you'll make it through sooner or later.
Sally: But we've trained and trained and I keep dying!
Robert: Maybe we should change up our approach a bit.
Sally: What do you mean?
[Cut to a montage, with chiptune music reminiscent of the Punch-Out theme. The montage starts with Robert riding a bike and Sally running after him, wearing a pink sweatshirt. Sally ends up tripping and falling flat on her face. Game Store Girl #1 passes by and mocks Sally. Cut to Sally punching a punching bag, with Robert standing in the background. Robert gives the thumbs up, and the punching bag clocks Sally and knocks her into a wall. Cut again and Sally is running from bees. Cut to Robert and Sally running up a giant flight of steps. However, at the top, it's revealed to be an amusement park entrance. The two of them spend time at the amusement park - going on roller coasters - a haunted house, making silly faces in a photo booth. The montage ends with them happily exiting the amusement park, wearing a bunch of souvenirs and snacks.]
Robert: That was the best day I had in awhile.
Sally: Same here! I almost completely forgot about the--
[Sally drops her snacks and souvenirs and just stares on in shock.]
Sally: The game!
[Robert turns around.]
Robert: Huh?
Sally: The game! We were supposed to be training for the game, but instead we just did a bunch of random stuff that had nothing to do with it!
Robert: Yeah, I thought it was kinda odd when you asked me to get on my bike.
Sally: On the plus side, I can run like the wind now.
Robert: Yeah, you should probably enter a race.
Sally: You really think so-- Agh! We're getting distracted again. Come on, I'm gonna beat that game once and for all.
Robert: That was the best day I had in awhile.
Sally: Same here! I almost completely forgot about the--
[Sally drops her snacks and souvenirs and just stares on in shock.]
Sally: The game!
[Robert turns around.]
Robert: Huh?
Sally: The game! We were supposed to be training for the game, but instead we just did a bunch of random stuff that had nothing to do with it!
Robert: Yeah, I thought it was kinda odd when you asked me to get on my bike.
Sally: On the plus side, I can run like the wind now.
Robert: Yeah, you should probably enter a race.
Sally: You really think so-- Agh! We're getting distracted again. Come on, I'm gonna beat that game once and for all.
[Cut to Sally at Robert back home on the couch.]
Robert: You ready for this?
Sally: [Determined] I'm as ready as I can be.
[Autumn walks by without saying anything]
Sally: Autumn! Get out of the living room! You're distracting me!
Autumn: I'm just getting a drink.
Sally: Go and... do your homework.
[Autumn looks confused.]
Autumn: I can't. You're playing the game console.
Sally: It's called a Sapphire System for your information.
Autumn: Whatever it's called, I can't do my homework if you're playing it.
[Sally looks unimpressed. There's a quick succession of rapid cuts. Sally keeps that same unimpressed expression throughout the entire sequence. Sally gets in the car. She fastens her seatbelt. She drives for a bit. She arrives at a store. She takes a console off of the shelf. She pays at the cashier. She drives a bit more. She parks again. She selects wrapping paper at a store. She drives home. And finally, she presents Autumn with the wrapped present, complete with a bow.]
Sally: Merry Miracle Day.
[Autumn confusedly takes the console]
Autumn: Um... thank you?
Sally: Now go do your homework.
[Sally finally sits down on the couch next to Robert.]
Sally: Alright, I'm ready.
Shadowy Figure: Look who's returned.
Robert: Already, press start and you're ready to begin.
[Sally starts playing the game. This time around, it's similar to the show's typical animation style. The music is still chiptune. Sally is in an ice level]
Sally: Huh, I didn't know the game had 3D graphics
[Robert appears, dressed as a Tinkerbell-style fairy, in a reference to Navi. He's the advice fairy.]
Robert: Well yeah... they had to change something for the remake.
Sally: Well, why did they have the 2D graphics at all?
Robert: Some people wouldn't be happy if they changed anything at all.
[Before Sally can say anything, an evil ice dragon stamps down. It's guarding the way.]
Sally: The boss! I'm going to use the fire wand!
Robert: No, you've got to use the ice wand.
Sally: But... it's an ice dragon.
Robert: Yeah. I guess the logic is that because it's already in a cold place, if you made it even colder, it would kill it faster than warming it up.
[Sally uses the ice wand and it kills the dragon. She's unimpressed.]
Sally: Well, that's just stupid.
Robert: Yeah but, I'm sure the game designer had a very good reason for making it this way.
[Cutaway gag to a bunch of kid game designers, including a cameo of kid Shane.]
Kid Shane: What if we made the ice dragon weak to ice?
Kid game designer #1: But that doesn't make any sense.
Kid Shane: That's why it's funny!
[Everyone ends up giggling]
Kid game designer #1: And if they lose to the boss, we can send them back three levels!
[Kid Shane is deadpan and unimpressed]
Kid Shane: Now that's just cruel.
Sally: Huh, I didn't know the game had 3D graphics
[Robert appears, dressed as a Tinkerbell-style fairy, in a reference to Navi. He's the advice fairy.]
Robert: Well yeah... they had to change something for the remake.
Sally: Well, why did they have the 2D graphics at all?
Robert: Some people wouldn't be happy if they changed anything at all.
[Before Sally can say anything, an evil ice dragon stamps down. It's guarding the way.]
Sally: The boss! I'm going to use the fire wand!
Robert: No, you've got to use the ice wand.
Sally: But... it's an ice dragon.
Robert: Yeah. I guess the logic is that because it's already in a cold place, if you made it even colder, it would kill it faster than warming it up.
[Sally uses the ice wand and it kills the dragon. She's unimpressed.]
Sally: Well, that's just stupid.
Robert: Yeah but, I'm sure the game designer had a very good reason for making it this way.
[Cutaway gag to a bunch of kid game designers, including a cameo of kid Shane.]
Kid Shane: What if we made the ice dragon weak to ice?
Kid game designer #1: But that doesn't make any sense.
Kid Shane: That's why it's funny!
[Everyone ends up giggling]
Kid game designer #1: And if they lose to the boss, we can send them back three levels!
[Kid Shane is deadpan and unimpressed]
Kid Shane: Now that's just cruel.
[Cut to Sally and Fairy Robert going through the sky level, where the wind is pushing her back. Sally gets knocked off of a ledge and Sally ends up hanging on the edge of a platform, and is looking down into an infinite abyss.]
Sally: It's my last life! Robbie, tell me what to do!
Robert: What can I do? I'm not exactly player one right now.
Sally: Tell me the infinite lives code!
Robert: It's still in the game?
Sally: [Angrily] You knew the code the whole time and you didn't tell me!?
Robert: I thought you weren't interested.
Sally: But I don't want to start the whole game over again!
[The darkened clouds of the sky form the Shadowy Figure.]
Shadowy Figure: Go ahead! use the code, Sally. Prove that you're still just level one.
[During "level one" the Shadowy Figure's voice morphs into Game Store Girl #1's voice.]
Robert: Alright, the code is two up, two down--
Sally: No, I'm gonna prove I can do it. I'm gonna beat the game without the code
[From this point on, the Shadowy Figure and Game Store Girl #1's voices are fused together.]
Shadowy Figure: Pity...
[The cloud throws a lightning strike, and Sally falls down.]
Shadowy Figure: Game over, Sally. Try again.
[Cut to Sally being reincarnated back at level one. Fairy Robert flies around her. Sally is angry and sweaty.]
Robert: We could take a break if you want.
Sally: [Determined] No! I'm gonna make it this time.
[Cut to a montage of near-still images of Sally jumping over pits, Sally monsters, running from bees, shooting things with a bazooka, and finally returning to the sky level.]
Robert: Careful Sally, you've only got one life left.
[As Sally says this, the HUD appears, showing that Sally only has one life available. Sally's resolve still isn't broken.]
Sally: One life's all I need.
[Sally runs and jumps over the platforms that she died over last time and makes it to the other side with stellar acrobatics.]
Robert: That was pretty cliche.
Sally: Sometimes it's about style.
Robert: Alright, let's take on the boss.
[Cut to Sally walking into a sky arena.]
Sally: Is that a--
Robert: Yup.
[A giant "Share Bear" appears on screen and shoots a rainbow beam at Sally, to which she blocks with her sword.]
Sally: Isn't that breaking copyright?
Robert: Not if they don't use its real name.
Share Bear: Share Bear loves you! Share Bear wants to play!
[Sally jumps and slashes with her sword. The Share Bear goes down easily.]
Sally: It's my last life! Robbie, tell me what to do!
Robert: What can I do? I'm not exactly player one right now.
Sally: Tell me the infinite lives code!
Robert: It's still in the game?
Sally: [Angrily] You knew the code the whole time and you didn't tell me!?
Robert: I thought you weren't interested.
Sally: But I don't want to start the whole game over again!
[The darkened clouds of the sky form the Shadowy Figure.]
Shadowy Figure: Go ahead! use the code, Sally. Prove that you're still just level one.
[During "level one" the Shadowy Figure's voice morphs into Game Store Girl #1's voice.]
Robert: Alright, the code is two up, two down--
Sally: No, I'm gonna prove I can do it. I'm gonna beat the game without the code
[From this point on, the Shadowy Figure and Game Store Girl #1's voices are fused together.]
Shadowy Figure: Pity...
[The cloud throws a lightning strike, and Sally falls down.]
Shadowy Figure: Game over, Sally. Try again.
[Cut to Sally being reincarnated back at level one. Fairy Robert flies around her. Sally is angry and sweaty.]
Robert: We could take a break if you want.
Sally: [Determined] No! I'm gonna make it this time.
[Cut to a montage of near-still images of Sally jumping over pits, Sally monsters, running from bees, shooting things with a bazooka, and finally returning to the sky level.]
Robert: Careful Sally, you've only got one life left.
[As Sally says this, the HUD appears, showing that Sally only has one life available. Sally's resolve still isn't broken.]
Sally: One life's all I need.
[Sally runs and jumps over the platforms that she died over last time and makes it to the other side with stellar acrobatics.]
Robert: That was pretty cliche.
Sally: Sometimes it's about style.
Robert: Alright, let's take on the boss.
[Cut to Sally walking into a sky arena.]
Sally: Is that a--
Robert: Yup.
[A giant "Share Bear" appears on screen and shoots a rainbow beam at Sally, to which she blocks with her sword.]
Sally: Isn't that breaking copyright?
Robert: Not if they don't use its real name.
Share Bear: Share Bear loves you! Share Bear wants to play!
[Sally jumps and slashes with her sword. The Share Bear goes down easily.]
[Cut to Robert and Sally on the couch. It's a brief montage. The cat clock goes forward every couple of seconds. Sally and Robert transition to different positions. Cut back to the game. Video game Sally has destroyed a crystal boss.]
Sally: Alright! One level left!
Robert: High five!
[Sally tries to give fairy Robert a high five, but accidentally splats him on her hand.]
Sally: Sorry.
[Sally strikes a guilty expression as she peels him off.]
Robert: No worries.
Sally: Alright, just tell me how to beat this one and victory will be mine.
Robert: I uh...
Sally: You "uh" what?
Robert: I never actually beat the last level.
Sally: Wait, what!?
Robert: It's always been way too difficult. I tried to beat it while you were out, but I... still couldn't.
Sally: Then what am I supposed to--
[The Shadowy Figure appears before them, extremely angered.]
Shadowy Figure: You've defeated all seven of my minions. Now you shall pay! Welcome to die!
[The Shadowy Figure shoots a laser beam, but Sally manages to dodge just in time. She lands safely and angrily.]
Sally: What kind of game tries to kill you in a cutscene!?
Shadowy Figure: The only cutscene you shall face is the one in your heart!
[Robert and Sally give very confused expressions]
Robert: Maybe they should have spent some more time on translation.
Sally: But the game was... made in Americandy.
Robert: Yup.
[Sally gets warped to the final level, which is a space level.]
Sally: Woah, cool! Space! I wonder if I can moon jump.
Robert: Wait Sally--
[Sally tries jumping, but her gravity gets reversed (similar to VVVVVV or Gravity Man's stage from Mega Man 5]
Sally: One of these huh?
Robert: Yup.
Sally: Can't have a last stage without a gimmick, I guess.
[Cut to the two of them walking, upside down in a frame.]
Sally: So, I don't get it. It's not hard. Why couldn't you beat this level?
Robert: Well, there's that stuff over there.
[Robert points to the side, to metal crushers, tight pathways, lasers, spikes shooting everywhere, and a little kitten sleeping in a bed.]
Sally: I see what you mean.
Robert: Also, the time limit was really killer.
Sally: Time limit?
[A "Hurry Up" displays across the screen, and a time limit appears up in the corner of a psuedo HUD. Sally has one minute to circumvent all of these obstacles.]
Robert: I guess--
Sally: Talk later! Game now!
[Sally darts ahead, jumping rapidly from the floor to the ceiling. She dodges the lasers, barely manages to get past the spikes, slides under some metal crushers, and gets to the kitten where she stops and pets it.]
Sally: Ooh! Who's a good little cute kitty! You are! Yes you are!
[As Sally does that, the final door to the boss open up.]
Sally: Good kitty.
Robert: Time Sally!
[Sally makes final dash for the exit door, slides under a final barrage of obstacles and makes it through the door.]
Sally: Alright! One level left!
Robert: High five!
[Sally tries to give fairy Robert a high five, but accidentally splats him on her hand.]
Sally: Sorry.
[Sally strikes a guilty expression as she peels him off.]
Robert: No worries.
Sally: Alright, just tell me how to beat this one and victory will be mine.
Robert: I uh...
Sally: You "uh" what?
Robert: I never actually beat the last level.
Sally: Wait, what!?
Robert: It's always been way too difficult. I tried to beat it while you were out, but I... still couldn't.
Sally: Then what am I supposed to--
[The Shadowy Figure appears before them, extremely angered.]
Shadowy Figure: You've defeated all seven of my minions. Now you shall pay! Welcome to die!
[The Shadowy Figure shoots a laser beam, but Sally manages to dodge just in time. She lands safely and angrily.]
Sally: What kind of game tries to kill you in a cutscene!?
Shadowy Figure: The only cutscene you shall face is the one in your heart!
[Robert and Sally give very confused expressions]
Robert: Maybe they should have spent some more time on translation.
Sally: But the game was... made in Americandy.
Robert: Yup.
[Sally gets warped to the final level, which is a space level.]
Sally: Woah, cool! Space! I wonder if I can moon jump.
Robert: Wait Sally--
[Sally tries jumping, but her gravity gets reversed (similar to VVVVVV or Gravity Man's stage from Mega Man 5]
Sally: One of these huh?
Robert: Yup.
Sally: Can't have a last stage without a gimmick, I guess.
[Cut to the two of them walking, upside down in a frame.]
Sally: So, I don't get it. It's not hard. Why couldn't you beat this level?
Robert: Well, there's that stuff over there.
[Robert points to the side, to metal crushers, tight pathways, lasers, spikes shooting everywhere, and a little kitten sleeping in a bed.]
Sally: I see what you mean.
Robert: Also, the time limit was really killer.
Sally: Time limit?
[A "Hurry Up" displays across the screen, and a time limit appears up in the corner of a psuedo HUD. Sally has one minute to circumvent all of these obstacles.]
Robert: I guess--
Sally: Talk later! Game now!
[Sally darts ahead, jumping rapidly from the floor to the ceiling. She dodges the lasers, barely manages to get past the spikes, slides under some metal crushers, and gets to the kitten where she stops and pets it.]
Sally: Ooh! Who's a good little cute kitty! You are! Yes you are!
[As Sally does that, the final door to the boss open up.]
Sally: Good kitty.
Robert: Time Sally!
[Sally makes final dash for the exit door, slides under a final barrage of obstacles and makes it through the door.]
[Cut to Sally's relieved smile on the other side before she realizes that she has forgotten something. Cut to Robert on the other side of the door. It appears that the kitten is trying to eat him, but before that can happen, Sally grabs him and pulls him through the door before it collapses.]
[The shadowy figure appears.]
Shadowy Figure: (Evil laughter)
Sally: What's so funny? How I'm finally going to defeat you and restore balance to the world?
Shadowy Figure: I love how deluded you are, Sally. You're still level one!
[There's a bright light, forcing Sally to protect her eyes. She looks up and sees that she's facing the king slime back in the grass level. The scene stays on video game Sally, but the pause jingle is heard. Time is frozen for everything except Sally and Robert. Sally looks up at the HUD, which reads "Boss rush."]
Sally: What is this!?
[Sally angrily points to the King Slime behind her.]
Sally: Well? What is this!?
Robert: [Awkwardly] I guess it's... the boss rush.
Sally: Boss rush?
Robert: You got to fight every boss in the game again before you can fight Didgeridoo.
Sally: WHAT?
Robert: Yeah, games used to do a lot of stuff like this to extend longevity.
Sally: Please excuse me for a moment.
[Sally marches off screen. Sally gives disgruntled shouts, that are given pixelated/chiptune censors. Robert and King Slime look at each other awkwardly. Then Sally marches back and wipes her brow.]
Sally: Alright, I'm good. Let's do this.
[Robert shrugs, and the pause jingle is heard. Sally goes crazy and begins bashing the King Slime angrily, devastating the poor thing.]
Sally: This is what you get for making me fight every boss in the game over again!
[Discretion shot as Sally continually pummels the thing. The camera focuses on Robert as his expressions get more and more shocked. A triumphant item jingle is heard and Sally holds a bottle filled with King Slime to the camera.]
Robert: I didn't even know you could do that.
Sally: Anything's possible when a game annoys you enough.
Robert: Well onto the second boss.
Sally: Good, I still got some pent up rage.
[The shadowy figure appears.]
Shadowy Figure: (Evil laughter)
Sally: What's so funny? How I'm finally going to defeat you and restore balance to the world?
Shadowy Figure: I love how deluded you are, Sally. You're still level one!
[There's a bright light, forcing Sally to protect her eyes. She looks up and sees that she's facing the king slime back in the grass level. The scene stays on video game Sally, but the pause jingle is heard. Time is frozen for everything except Sally and Robert. Sally looks up at the HUD, which reads "Boss rush."]
Sally: What is this!?
[Sally angrily points to the King Slime behind her.]
Sally: Well? What is this!?
Robert: [Awkwardly] I guess it's... the boss rush.
Sally: Boss rush?
Robert: You got to fight every boss in the game again before you can fight Didgeridoo.
Sally: WHAT?
Robert: Yeah, games used to do a lot of stuff like this to extend longevity.
Sally: Please excuse me for a moment.
[Sally marches off screen. Sally gives disgruntled shouts, that are given pixelated/chiptune censors. Robert and King Slime look at each other awkwardly. Then Sally marches back and wipes her brow.]
Sally: Alright, I'm good. Let's do this.
[Robert shrugs, and the pause jingle is heard. Sally goes crazy and begins bashing the King Slime angrily, devastating the poor thing.]
Sally: This is what you get for making me fight every boss in the game over again!
[Discretion shot as Sally continually pummels the thing. The camera focuses on Robert as his expressions get more and more shocked. A triumphant item jingle is heard and Sally holds a bottle filled with King Slime to the camera.]
Robert: I didn't even know you could do that.
Sally: Anything's possible when a game annoys you enough.
Robert: Well onto the second boss.
Sally: Good, I still got some pent up rage.
[Cut to Sally fighting the crystal creature once again.]
Sally: This time when I kill you, stay dead!
Robert: Alright, it's time for the final boss.
Sally: [Still angry] Are you sure!? Maybe I should fight through the bosses one more time again. Anything if it makes the game longer, right? That makes it better! More worth the money! Oh, I've got an even better idea! What if I had to play through the whole game again!
Robert: You might.
Sally: Huh?
Robert: You're still on your last life.
Sally: Oh yeah...
Robert: Just don't lose your cool, and I know there's nothing this game can throw out you that you can't handle.
Sally: Right.
[They get warped to the final boss.]
Shadowy Figure: B-but how!? Nevermind that. I shall attack ye aggressively and I shall have a pertinence to please!
Sally: Oh shut up! Who gets any fun out of the stories in these games anyway?
Robert: Honestly, I am.
[Sally looks at him, dumbfounded.]
Robert: You know, ironically.
[The Shadowy Figure shoots a laser beam at Sally, but she dodges. She runs at the creature, but as soon as she swings her sword, it teleports to the other side of the room. There are quickly edited images of Sally attempting to use all of her items, but the Shadowy Figure is immune to all of them.]
Sally: Nothing I have can hurt it!
Robert: Well, maybe you're not supposed to use something you have.
[The Shadowy Figure begins charging up its laser again.]
Sally: Wait, you don't mean?
[The Shadowy Figure shoots a laser blast.]
Sally: Ugh, that is such a cliche!
[Sally swings her sword and reflects the laser blast, letting the laser zap the Shadowy Figure.]
Robert: Like you said, it's about style.
[Cut to the Shadowy Figure, looking angry and determined.]
Shadowy Figure: You may have bested me, but now let me show you my TRUE FORM.
[Sally marches over the Shadowy Figure. While she does, she says:]
Sally: Nope. Nope. Not doing that. Not today.
[Sally takes the King Slime bottle out of her inventory and smacks it across the Shadowy Figure. It begins melting]
Sally: This game has used up enough of my time. I'm done here.
Shadowy Figure: I'm melting! I'm melting!
Sally: Good.
Sally: This time when I kill you, stay dead!
Robert: Alright, it's time for the final boss.
Sally: [Still angry] Are you sure!? Maybe I should fight through the bosses one more time again. Anything if it makes the game longer, right? That makes it better! More worth the money! Oh, I've got an even better idea! What if I had to play through the whole game again!
Robert: You might.
Sally: Huh?
Robert: You're still on your last life.
Sally: Oh yeah...
Robert: Just don't lose your cool, and I know there's nothing this game can throw out you that you can't handle.
Sally: Right.
[They get warped to the final boss.]
Shadowy Figure: B-but how!? Nevermind that. I shall attack ye aggressively and I shall have a pertinence to please!
Sally: Oh shut up! Who gets any fun out of the stories in these games anyway?
Robert: Honestly, I am.
[Sally looks at him, dumbfounded.]
Robert: You know, ironically.
[The Shadowy Figure shoots a laser beam at Sally, but she dodges. She runs at the creature, but as soon as she swings her sword, it teleports to the other side of the room. There are quickly edited images of Sally attempting to use all of her items, but the Shadowy Figure is immune to all of them.]
Sally: Nothing I have can hurt it!
Robert: Well, maybe you're not supposed to use something you have.
[The Shadowy Figure begins charging up its laser again.]
Sally: Wait, you don't mean?
[The Shadowy Figure shoots a laser blast.]
Sally: Ugh, that is such a cliche!
[Sally swings her sword and reflects the laser blast, letting the laser zap the Shadowy Figure.]
Robert: Like you said, it's about style.
[Cut to the Shadowy Figure, looking angry and determined.]
Shadowy Figure: You may have bested me, but now let me show you my TRUE FORM.
[Sally marches over the Shadowy Figure. While she does, she says:]
Sally: Nope. Nope. Not doing that. Not today.
[Sally takes the King Slime bottle out of her inventory and smacks it across the Shadowy Figure. It begins melting]
Sally: This game has used up enough of my time. I'm done here.
Shadowy Figure: I'm melting! I'm melting!
Sally: Good.
[Cut to the real world.]
Robert: Wow, you did it Sally.
Sally: Y-yeah. I actually did it!
Robert: How do you feel?
Sally: Pretty good, actually.
Robert: Oh, let's be quiet. It's time for the ending.
Sally: One that I earned, without the infinite lives code.
[Cut to a montage of a long ending with happy music and a bunch of pixelated people heralding the pixel Sally has a hero. This should take some reference from the ActRaiser ending. After the montage, cut back to Sally, actually crying at the happy ending.]
Robert: Sally, are you crying?
[Sally nods with a smile.]
Sally: That was the best game I've ever played! Let's do it again!
Robert: Woah Sally, it's three in the morning. I think we should be getting to bed.
[Sally yawns]
Sally: Yeah, I think you're right. There's something I've got to do first though.
Robert: Wow, you did it Sally.
Sally: Y-yeah. I actually did it!
Robert: How do you feel?
Sally: Pretty good, actually.
Robert: Oh, let's be quiet. It's time for the ending.
Sally: One that I earned, without the infinite lives code.
[Cut to a montage of a long ending with happy music and a bunch of pixelated people heralding the pixel Sally has a hero. This should take some reference from the ActRaiser ending. After the montage, cut back to Sally, actually crying at the happy ending.]
Robert: Sally, are you crying?
[Sally nods with a smile.]
Sally: That was the best game I've ever played! Let's do it again!
Robert: Woah Sally, it's three in the morning. I think we should be getting to bed.
[Sally yawns]
Sally: Yeah, I think you're right. There's something I've got to do first though.
[Cut to the Game Store Girls' house, in one of the Game Store Girl's bedrooms. There's a tapping sound. She gets up nervously, and walks silently through the house, flashlight in hand. The noise gets louder and louder as she gets to a door. She opens the door to see a smug Sally standing there.]
Sally: In your face!
Game Store girl: What?
[She rubs her eyes]
Sally: I beat the game!
Game Store Girl: Oh, you must be here to see my sister. Upstairs, second door on the right.
Sally: Thanks!
[Sally triumphantly skips by. After a beat, Sally says:]
Sally (off-screen): In your face!
[Sally smugly walks past Game Store Girl #2. She stops and gives a very friendly smile.]
Sally: Thank you, you've been a wonderful host and I'll be sure to visit your store again soon.
Game Store Girl #2: Oh cool. We're getting that remake of Battlefrogs soon--
Sally: Nah, I think I'll skip that one. The whole retro revival thing is kinda played out at this point.
[Sally nonchalantly walks off.]
Sally: In your face!
Game Store girl: What?
[She rubs her eyes]
Sally: I beat the game!
Game Store Girl: Oh, you must be here to see my sister. Upstairs, second door on the right.
Sally: Thanks!
[Sally triumphantly skips by. After a beat, Sally says:]
Sally (off-screen): In your face!
[Sally smugly walks past Game Store Girl #2. She stops and gives a very friendly smile.]
Sally: Thank you, you've been a wonderful host and I'll be sure to visit your store again soon.
Game Store Girl #2: Oh cool. We're getting that remake of Battlefrogs soon--
Sally: Nah, I think I'll skip that one. The whole retro revival thing is kinda played out at this point.
[Sally nonchalantly walks off.]
[Cut to a transition card titled "Epilogue."]
[Cut to Game Store Girl #1, red-eyed, tapping away at Legend of Chain. Game Store Girl #2 walks by her room.]
Game Store Girl #2: You're still playing that?
Game Store Girl #1: So?
Game Store Girl #2: It's been 578 hours.
Game Store Girl #1: Yeah, but I can't let that girl beat me!
Game Store Girl #2: Lemme get this straight - you were making fun of her for not being able to beat a game... that you didn't beat yourself?
Game Store Girl #1: I got an image to keep!
Game Store Girl #2: Yeah... you've got the perfect image, sis.
Game Store Girl #1: Quiet! I'm almost done with the final boss.
[The Game Store Girl #1 defeats the Shadowy Figure]
Game Store Girl #1: Yes! Yes! I've done it!
[She gets an ending title screen and the voice reads off the "victory screen."]
Shadowy Figure: Conglaturation! You've beaten baby mode! Play through the game without the infinite lives code to unlock the True Ending!
[Iris out on Game Store Girl #1 crying with the thought of having to play through the game again.]
[Cut to Game Store Girl #1, red-eyed, tapping away at Legend of Chain. Game Store Girl #2 walks by her room.]
Game Store Girl #2: You're still playing that?
Game Store Girl #1: So?
Game Store Girl #2: It's been 578 hours.
Game Store Girl #1: Yeah, but I can't let that girl beat me!
Game Store Girl #2: Lemme get this straight - you were making fun of her for not being able to beat a game... that you didn't beat yourself?
Game Store Girl #1: I got an image to keep!
Game Store Girl #2: Yeah... you've got the perfect image, sis.
Game Store Girl #1: Quiet! I'm almost done with the final boss.
[The Game Store Girl #1 defeats the Shadowy Figure]
Game Store Girl #1: Yes! Yes! I've done it!
[She gets an ending title screen and the voice reads off the "victory screen."]
Shadowy Figure: Conglaturation! You've beaten baby mode! Play through the game without the infinite lives code to unlock the True Ending!
[Iris out on Game Store Girl #1 crying with the thought of having to play through the game again.]
